Love?

**this is not a depressed post, but a prostrate convicted post.  I write this with hope**

I am frequently impatient and harsh.
Many times I put myself on an undeserving pedistal, speaking about the greatness of myself and the things I've done.  I buy into these things, thinking that I caused them, and I take credit.
I choose to be rude, when I could be polite.  I am selfish and stand up for myself unnecessarily.

What is that saying, turn the other cheek?  Yeah right!  If I don't stand up for myself who will?

I frequently get puffed up and angry about the smallest thing.  I don't let these things go.  I know the Truth, but many times I choose to go without it.  I do not protect what is right, I don't know how to trust (that's scary).  I have lost hope, and am sick of waiting it out.

Thank my God that there is someone else who is better at this loving thing...because I certainly fail frequently.