Gold Star Jar

A couple friends and I started keeping gold star jars.  The idea is to put a gold star into the jar whenever we do something that we're really proud of.  Once we're out of stars (181 to be exact), we get to celebrate with a girls' day...doing whatever we dang well please.

It's known in dog training that if you provide the canine friend with a treat after they do something good they will likely affiliate that action with something good (rather than the annoying task that it once was).  We should definitely do more of this with ourselves :)  I would love to reward myself with a cookie...but there is a lot of research showing that doing this will create a very unhealthy relationship with food...and I need all the help I can get in that area.  If you want to feel good and successful then you will likely end up eating a cookie, rather than completing the rewarding task.

SOOOO...my answer was the gold star jar.  Each time that we put a star in the jar we write the date on it and why we are including it.  After doing this for a couple of months, I have found that my dear friends only have a few stars in their jars...I personally think they're too hard on themselves.  If I was in charge of their jars they would have hundreds in there already!  I think I am going to change the plan for the jars, from here on out we are going to have 3 stars per day for 3 months.  This will force my friends to include their 3 most proud moments from each day in their jars....buahahahaha!  Maybe this will start to open their eyes to the way that I see them...really freaking amazing women who inspire me to be a better person and continue pushing myself every day.

When I was little

Below is a glimpse into my reality (or at least what I thought it was) when I was a younger person.

• The saying is 'butt load' (not boat load)
• Cats and dogs are the same animal, cats are girls and dogs are boys
• In Winnie-the-Pooh, Roo and Kanga, if said frontwards, is Kanga-roo..woah...mind blower!
• Cats can talk. I have extensive conversations with my cat, Blackie, trying to convince her that she can trust me, 'I won't tell anyone your secret, not even mom'
• Little House on the Prairie is the best book and show...EVER (well, it still is, who am I kidding?)
• Why do people say: 'I know it like the back of my head'?  I have no idea what the back of my head looks like!
• Leisl in Sound of Music is super old...16 going on 17...ummm...ancient
• My sister Sarah is so witch!
• Everything is better when things equal 9 (long story)
• Midnight snacks are great, it always makes Mom really happy when she wakes up to find fingerprinted chunks taken out of the butter
• When milk is added to cereal, it actually multiplies...like gremlins...it is crazy
• My sister and I sing the hit song from Footloose 'Dancin' in the Streets' at the top of our lungs...in church, our mother is very proud. (p.s. our dad was the youth pastor and the song was actually called 'Dancin' in the Sheets'...my sister and I misunderstood)
• It is NOT appropriate to leave the house without my glittery shoes on
• But it IS appropriate to lift my dress up over my head to scratch my stomach while singing in the church choir, front row and center
• I frequently retrieve things from the glove department. And our family keeps things in the way-back (most people call it the trunk) 
• If I climb up a tree facing in then it only makes sense to climb down the tree facing out, obviously

Cookie Perimeters

*The names in this story have been changed to protect the innocent.


Many years ago, Miss Sweet Thing and Miss Sassy Pants McGee became good friends.  After hanging out for quite a while Miss Thing (often pronounced 'Thang'...but not if in church or any other up-and-up type of place) thought it would be fun to introduce her good friend McGee to her boyfriend, the Captain.

The new friends sat down at a neutral location to have a meal.  McGee quickly discovered that the full name of her new friend was Captain Sarcastic, and rightfully so...this man was a force to be reckoned with in the department of facetious-isms. At the end of the meal the waiter came and asked if any dessert was wanted before preparing the bill.  The Captain looked at his beautiful girlfriend and guest and asked if they would like anything.  Both Thang and Sassy kindly said 'No' (they were on a diet as most women are at any given moment).  The Captain on the other hand, with his obnoxious male metabolism, asked for one of the large chocolate chip cookies that the establishment prided itself on.


When the cookie arrived, Captain Sarcastic saw Sassy's eyes become the size of golf balls and start to sparkle, a small amount of drool was also visible at the corner of her mouth.  The Captain then asked, 'Sassy, are you thinking twice about that dessert now?  Would you like some of my cookie?' After a few moments of deep contemplation Miss McGee pulled up her sassy suspenders holding up her pants and said, 'Really?  That would be awesome because that cookie looks amazing.'  Captain Sarcastic then slid the plate over to the opposite side of the table in front of his lunch guest.  He then added, '(sigh) Next time you should just order your own damn cookie!'

Sassy was amazed that the Captain gave her the whole cookie, completely trusting her with the delicacy. She looked up and asked, 'which part should I tear off?' Sarcastic replied, 'Well you might as well eat whatever part you want, since you are eating MY cookie anyways'.

Nobody knows what was going on in Miss McGee's head at that moment, or why her sass was out in brute force that day, but what happened next would go down in the record books.  She picked up the cookie and examined it, and without thinking about it took her thumb and poked the middle right out.  She popped the best and most gooey portion of the cooking into her mouth, and handed the cookie back to a very shocked and appalled Sarcastic man.

Looking across the table, Sassy saw both of her friends mouths drop. Until that moment Miss Thing had not known quite how Sassy the Pants of McGee were, but the sassy-ness level was then quite obvious...and extreme. Miss Thing started to laugh, and Captain Sarcastic was nearly speechless (which is very unusual) all he could say was, 'Really?....Seriously?...Did that just happen?.....Who ARE you???'

And from that moment on The Sass and The Sarcastic have been extremely good friends.

About two years after this, Sassy Pants was living 2 hours away from Captain and Mrs. Sweetly Sarcastic (they had been married since the first story). One day Miss Sassy Pants McGee missed her friends a great deal and decided to send them a care package.  She worked hard to make the care package very sweet (she had been taking lessons from her old friend the Thang).

Some time later, Captain and Mrs. Sweetly Sarcastic received a package with a note attached to the front that read:

For Captain Sarcastic and the Sweet Thing

(but mostly for the Sarcastic)

When they opened the package, they saw about 3 dozen cookies without the centers, each had been cut out by hand...and kept by some sender who was wearing her favorite pair of Sassy Pants.  The Captain immediately sent her a message that read, 'Thanks for the damn cookies!'

Perfectly planned and 2 days later, the Captain received a very small, 2"x2" red box in the mail.  It had no note attached, but its contents caused Mr. Sarcastic to send a message to the great Sass:

'Some smart ass just sent me a box of cookie centers...and I'm not even done eating the cookie perimeters'.

The big (glittery) apple - day 3

The morning of our third day was a funny time to me. My traveling companions wanted to get up at 6:30 or 7:00 in order to make the most of our day and I wanted to sleep in. I inadvertently got my way because the alarm didn't go off, so we got up at 8:00 and left the house by 9:00.

Our first stop was to Bryant Park because our efforts to ice skate were thwarted by the swarm of people the night before. I've discovered that I have quite a substantial crush on Bryant Park and am fairly certain that I would spend a great deal of time there if I lived in the apple. Once we were there I immediately wished that the alarm had gone off in order to give us a couple more hours of ice skating fun. The ice skating was quite a bit easier than I remembered and could not resist the urge to skate quite quickly from time to time, weaving between all of the other tourists. One of my favorite things about skating rinks, whether it be roller or ice, is the outside of the ring with all of the kids hanging on for dear life. Their brows are scrunched in concentration and they hang on for dear life with knuckles white, just sure that life will end if they let go. I remember feeling that way back in the days of side pony tails and Skate King birthdays. Our time at the rink was cut short, as we had reservations for visiting the statue of liberty...and we weren't about to miss that!

Holy crimany shiznit was it was cold waiting for the boat to the statue. As we waited we were discussing how nice it would be to take the cruise and tour during the summer with warmer weather, but ultimately decided that going when it was cold was better because it showed our commitment, and believe me, to wait through this wind we certainly proved our commitment.  The visit to the Statue and Ellis Island were a great experience.  There are millions of people who entered the United States through this port.  Their first stop in America was on Ellis Island to get registered and checked for any illness.  While on the island I looked across the water to the ocean and was amazed by the fact that there was nothing between New York and Europe besides water...what a journey that would be...I would have been so happy to see the iconic lady welcoming me to land!

The questionnaire they had the new immigrants fill out was quite funny.  One of my favorite parts was that they asked for you to state your 'occupation or calling'...just in case you weren't working you could just fill in what you WISH you were doing.  I wonder if anyone filled in something like: Chimney Sweep (but I feel called to groom shrubs).  You also had to fill out if you were a polygamist or anarchist (only really stupid anarchists would check yes I suppose).

The evening was filled with New York's best doughnuts from Doughnut Plant and pizza from Lombardi's. The trip to NYC with the girls was so much fun!  Thanks for coming with me Mandy and Kayla, it would not have been nearly as fun without you...I would have just been walking around NYC talking to myself...and NYC doesn't need any more of those types in the city.

The big (glittery) apple - day 2

Today at about 10am, we ventured off to the Metropolitan Museum of Art.  Wow, that place is breathtaking.  I’m pretty sure that I could spend an entire day there, but that’s not exactly the best use of time when you only have 72 hours in Manhattan, so we only spent about 3 hours in the great building that holds so many treasures and beauties. 


We started in the European Paintings section of the museum, and I felt like I was back in one of Italy’s museums, all of a sudden I was nostalgic for Rome of Venice…although Florence was my favorite of the many Italian cities Crystal and I visited while there so many years ago.  It's very strange to go to a museum and see places that you have been depicted from the 1720. I was standing in the Met in New York and looking at the very familiar St. Marks square in Venice. It looked pretty much identical back then. Awesome!

While walking through the paintings we came to one room that just seemed out of place.  El Greco had a heavier hand than many artists in this day.  I was struck by the dark colors and morbid tones after so many rooms full of bright paintings from artists like Giovanni Tiepolo, Francois Boucher and Nicolas Poussin. Greco seemed like he was born in the wrong era, he was completely ahead of his time.   I enjoyed the View of Toledo in particular.

We eventually made it down to the Egyptian exhibit.  There was a large room with one entire wall made of windows, outside you could see the skyscrapers of New York City.  Inside the room were large portions of a pyramid with hieroglyphs all over the bricks.  It was amazing to me that I could see a  piece of building that was originally constricted in Egypt during the time of 2381–2323 B.C. in the same eye shot as a skyscraper.

After the Met, we took a stroll through Central Park with our new friend Herbert the Hippo.  I would spend entire days in the park if I lived in the city, no doubt.  

In the evening we went to Radio City Music Hall to enjoy the Christmas Spectacular show.  The Rockets are really great at what they do...but I don't know why it's necessary for them to cancan so much.  They reminded me of a very professional team of the Chatelaines (my highschool dance team).  We all agreed that the best part of the show was when all fo the Rockets were dressed as Santa Claus'.  The show started at 10pm, and in true Liane fashion, I fell asleep for the last dance, oopsies.

The big (glittery) apple - Day 1

I arrived last night to New York in a town car from Tarrytown House Estate.  Once I arrived at my boss, France’s, apartment she showed me around her cute little condo about the size of a cracker box (typical New York I suppose).  I really like this apartment, and could see myself living here if I ever wanted to live in New York.  The location is AMAZING!  94^th and Madison…only 1 block (literally) from Central Park…so GREAT!

My friends Mandy and Kayla arrived in the city from Chicago at 10:30pm and we quickly decided that we needed some sustenance, so we went to a local market around the corner.  The box of Apple Jacks that Mandy bought was almost $6, a little pricey if you ask me…but once you pop you can’t stop…wait that’s the wrong brand. 

This morning when we woke up we had a little snack and headed over to Central Park.  I found a nifty Central Park Running Map online, and came up with the grand idea the night before of running the entire Park Drive Loop.  So I began my run with wool socks and a long sleeve shirt because it was about 35 degrees out.  The run was sooo great and I felt like a real New Yorker (I can hear the Dougy Houser theme song in my head right now…I feel like him writing notes about my day…and I’m wearing leg warmers right now so it’s almost like I’m in the 80s).  A city really begins to feel like your own when you’ve run through it.  I’m super amazed by Central Park, it is ginormous, and I’m proud that the city puts the money ($25 million/year) towards keeping it up in such a great way…I was in awe.  Before spending time in the park I expected it to be one large lawn with some trees in the middle.  This is so not true.  This park is fantastic, every corner you turn there is something new to see and enjoy, it’s a real treat.

After going back to the condo to get ready, we headed of to the Guggenheim Museum and pondered some amazing pieces of art.  I got to know the works of Picasso much better, I had no idea that he painted so many different types of pieces, I thought that he just focused on the cubist style, but some of his works are quite straight forward and inspiring.

At 4:30pm I came back to France’s condo to help her with some things that she needed to ship back to Seattle.  What a little adventure that turned out to be.  We packed all of the things into a huge 2’x3’box and loaded it on to the hand cart, we had 10 blocks to pull that thing through the city.  Half way there one of the wheels broke off, the dolly came completely apart.  So there we were, two women carrying a 50 pound box down Park Avenue in downtown Manhattan…what a riot.  After a few blocks we couldn’t carry it on our own anymore and I stopped into a flower shop to ask if any of the workers could lend a hand.  AND then, when I got the snottiest little reply I could imagine I realized that we were on Park Avenue.  I felt like a was in a classic New York movie with the attitude that was being dealt.  So we tried to hail a taxi.  While we were trying to find a cab, a nice upper class older gentleman offered to help us carry it the rest of the way, for 5 city blocks.  I swear he was an angel.  The whole time, of course I was thinking about how great of a story it would make (as usual).

That little adventure sure did raise my heart rate…and blood pressure J.  Next, we got all dressed up and pretty and headed out the door to Madison Square Garden to enjoy an evening of Wintuk, the winter Cirque Du Soleil show.  We had all wanted to see a Cirque Du Soleil show for a long time, and it was definitely everything that I was hoping for.  The whole show was filled with fun tricks and acrobatics…things I didn’t even know the human body could do.  The end was the best part, where it started to snow.  I think there was a good 2 inches of accumulation in my lap, of different sized tissue paper snowflake.  I smile just thinking about it!

On our way back to the condo, we took our time and stopped by Rockefeller Center to take a quick look at the tree.  It was nice, but not nearly as big as any of us expected, probably because they make such a big hairy deal about it on TV all the time.  We also stopped by Times Square which definitely isn’t my cuppa’ tea (or coffee for that matter), but I can definitely appreciate it for what it’s meant to be.  However, I definitely think that if I lived in Manhattan I would only end up in Times Square if there was a specific purpose or if I was passing through.  I definitely wouldn’t seek it out or spend time there on purpose.